This summer I had the honor of being able to partner with Catalyst Training School's Summer Program and was able to help the staff and come along side 38 young adults who were hungry for more of God. I got to witness these beautiful souls God put in front of me lay their lives down for a summer and dive head first into all of who Jesus is. I saw passion get sparked within their hearts, I saw hope come back into their eyes and I saw Jesus pour his love out on every single one of them as they sought him out for more. How wonderful is our God that He never fails to meet us in our seeking, He hears our cries and meets us in ways we never thought possible.
This summer I was blessed to meet 38 world changers and get to now call them my friends. Every moment this summer was marked by Gods love, laughter and raw community. We went after the heart of God together and the Lord is bringing kingdom shakers back to their hometowns that are now more than equipped to fight for Him. I got to see 38 faces change by encountering the love of a Father every day for three months. I got to see single individuals walk into a moment where they had to actively choose Jesus and lay down the worlds promises in pure faith, not knowing what their yes was going to mean. I got to learn more about Jesus in these 38 incredible friends than I ever thought this summer was capable of. I was blessed to make some of the best memories that I get to hold onto forever because God loves each of us that much to give us those kind of gifts. This summer we had four outreach teams go out into the nations and radically love on those across the world, share the gospel, bring healing, and encounter people with Gods love. Those four teams came back with a fire that will never cease because they partnered with God in reaching the lost and broken and brought love back into their hearts!
This summer I had the honor of serving the staff through the little tasks, preparing snack, through organizing details, and through laying down my life in the background. I didn't have a job that I had deemed as 'important' but the Lord used me as a glue to help spur on the other staff who were being called to lead in greater measures. I threw myself against the rock of humility time and time again, and realized that as long as I was being seen by God then being seen by man doesn't really matter.
This summer was full of joy but this summer was also hard. I'm in a constant wrestle to know who God is to me, to match what I've been taught and know to what I actually believe about Him. I know God is good, faithful, loving and true, but I let my circumstances tell me the exact opposite and the Lord allowed me to choose what I was going to believe about Him through it all. Honestly, there were times that I chose wrong, and I chose to be disappointed and angry at God because that's what my circumstances were telling me to feel. There were also times where I got to choose to believe how faithful God is and carry a hope in Him rather than letting those circumstances make me disheartened towards God. This summer like the season before is continuing to mold me into a heart that's worthy of Jesus and what it means to follow him.
This summer I had to be kindly reminded of the anger that still remains within my heart, and purely by Gods grace is it finally being exposed so I can fight it and get rid of it so I no longer have to live succumbed by it. I experienced testing and tension and hardships all while uncovering the way I respond to circumstances, and honestly not liking the way I do at all. I felt out of control in my emotions, and I could see how my sharp words inflicted wounds on people that I care about most. Obviously that't neither my hearts intention or how God created me, but rather how the enemy was holding me back. I was able to be surrounded by key people in my life who spoke truth into who they know I am, and pursue the freedom that's before me. They saw my heart and fought to believe the best about me when I wasn't acting my best.
Whats up next you might ask....?
Well, through prayer and shut doors by God, I have decided to do Catalyst Training School's Second Year Program to further my training in leadership, ministry, and restoration. It is with some hesitation that I step into this next season but I will choose to believe that the Lord is in it and will be faithful to meet me in ways I don't yet know I need.
What I do need though, is prayer. (Don't we all!) I need prayer for a few things.
1. Pray for my family and that God would continue to bring healing and restoration in the midst of chaos and hurt.
2. Pray for my next season as the Lord would continue working and exposing this deep root of anger that's been burdening my heart for far too long.
3. Pray for my family here in Tacoma and that they would receive radical provision in the coming season!
4. Pray for Catalyst Training school, the staff (Adam, Jenny, Stephen, Shane, Elizabeth, Aimee) as they pour their lives and hearts out because they believe in the next generation being raised up.
5. And pray for me. Please prayerfully consider joining with me in this next journey; I need to raise $3500 to cover Second Years tuition. More urgently, I need to pay the $300.00 deposit to secure my spot in the school by this Sunday! If you would like to join with me financially, please feel free to message me and I can let you know how.
My heart misses Arizona more than words can express but its also found a new home here in Tacoma. I deeply love you all, thanks for reading and caring so much about me.
I pray God blesses you so much and fills you with so much love and joy today!
